A letter to my 10 year old self.

I have always loved the thought of being able to travel back in time to maybe the roaring 20s or the flower power age of the ’70s, even 18th Century could be interesting but especially travelling along the course of my own life. I think it’s got a lot to do with recognizing how much my life has changed — from who I was as a 10-year-old girl to who I have become and how my experiences have shaped me to who I am today.

So here goes.

Dear 10 year old Kerry.

Hi – I’m your 41-year-old self. Don’t freak out, I know I seem really old and I promise to try to keep this brief because if I told you all the ins and outs of the last 31 years you’ll probably question how we’ve even made it this far. Surprisingly mum was right, as you get older you really do get wiser. We’re definitely not we’re we thought we would be living the country village life surrounded by horses.

Life has been full of surprises, twists and turns, I’m looking at you now playing roly-poly and cartwheels in the back garden with grandad and Giles treasure those moments with grandad and give him a big hug and tell him you love him, I know you already have questions of ‘why you’, no one will ever tell you this so I will it wasn’t your fault he was the teacher and adult and you are strong enough to turned it around to not be a victim. I’m sorry to say you will face more ups and downs in your teenage years some great moments and others not so much like being bullied by people you thought where friends and the relationship with your stepdad not great but you find love and calm in riding and looking after your horse Tom just know that everything will be alright and you get through it.

You will live with your dad and his family a few times but it never really works out, he’s a bit of a useless father to you but you end up having a great relationship with one of his daughters later on in life she’ll be a big support that comes as a welcome surprise. some people are just not meant to be in your life and this is okay you will begin to understand when you get a little older.

Mum is your hero She will be there for you through it all helping you even when you doubt it, don’t be scared to tell her about being diagnosed with Muscular Dystrophy at 24 out of everyone mum can help you transition through the hard and dark times. It’s takes you awhile to come out the darkness and truly embrace your disability. You will struggle at times to find your identity while trying to understand where you fit in within Society just don’t be afraid to ask for help and that’s okay. You got this, the family will be a huge support and you find some truly amazing life, long friends, along this journey. You even get married yes married something you tell people for years is never going to happen!

You will eventually find your calling and passion as a disability blogger and campaigner. I could tell you about all the special things that you are going to experience when you become a campaigner but I am going to save that for you to experience first hand. I will say though it’s going to completely change your life and those around you. Plus it’s an incredible journey you definitely don’t want to miss.

This virus outbreak in 2020 is going to be one for the ages. I’m not sure how to quite explain the magnitude of it and put it into words. But you will have to shield yourself from the outside world as well as the outside world from you over 140 days. It’s not going to be easy and you question a lot about life and why Is the disability world such a forgotten world. And don’t worry you will see family and friends again.

Before I say see you in 31 years – Allow yourself to be the best version of you learn from ever experience, never regret anything you do and never let anyone tell you what you can not be. People will try telling you differently and not everyone will embrace you if they don’t like you so what, remember if everyone liked you you’re doing something wrong, so Instead of focusing on those people focus on the ones that do. Your life is going to be full and you will have many moments of laughter, tears and happiness. keep working hard, enjoying life, I’m proud of who you are going to become!

💋 Kerry

What would you say to your 10-year-old self??

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Post you might like to read:

You don’t have to prove yourself

My disability, my identity

3 thoughts on “A letter to my 10 year old self.

  1. Kerry,

    This is beautiful and powerful. I like the way you express everything you feel. I feel the same way because of the virus. I have spastic quadriplegia Cerebral Palsy, hydrocephalus and 4 severe eyesight impairments. I am registered legally blind. And a fellow powerchair user. My husband is my rock. Keep doing what you do— I love your blog! I’m 38. Congrats on your marriage. My husband and I have been married a year and 3 months. I’m glad you found your soulmate 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

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