There’s a saying that ‘life begins at 40’. As my birthday looms closer I’m thinking more and more about turning the big 4-0.
But what does turning 40 mean to me as a disabled woman?.
With life expectancy on the increase these days due to advances in medicine and technology, more of us can expect to live to a ripe old age, meaning 40 is now the midway point in life, but is that the same case for me having Muscular Dystrophy there are no easy fix or modern-day medicine (yet) that will help slow or stop the muscles weakness,
So how are you meant to feel about this whole turning 40 it’s not as if a booklet drops though the post a month before to give you guidance (even though that would be so much easier!) I know some people freak out and it’s deny deny deny, others grab it with both hands screaming I’m 40, then you have the ones that say it’s just another birthday or the sudden realisation that time flew by too fast.
i guess I’m feeling a little of all of the above a tiny bit freaked out that I’m really nearly 40, the realisation that I’ve lost my 30’s somewhere on the way to 40! but at the same time I want to grab it with both hands saying ‘yes I’ve totally got this’ while writing a bucket list,
My thirty have taught me a great deal being a lifelong people pleaser I always find myself caring about what others think about me and not wanting to upset anyone at the same time I find I sacrifice things for me, over the past years I’ve learnt to change that into something far more healthy.
I now don’t care if people don’t like me.
you can’t please everyone all of the time someone is always going to have something to say about some you do whether it’s good or bad that just human nature, I don’t say yes when I meant no or smile when I’m actually upset. Life experiences mean I’ve learnt and grown that I’m confident in who I’ve become. As long as I’m at peace and like who I am then I’m okay If someone doesn’t agree, that’s absolutely okay I can quickly brush it off and move on.
I’m confident in ways I never imagined I’ve embraced my my life with Muscular Dystrophy and being in a wheelchair, where I can openly tell people about my life’s the struggles I face or have faced, not for sympathy or pity so others can learn I’m not hiding who I am, I use to limit my sarcasm when meeting new people until they knew me better and I them but I’ve learnt that’s me that’s my personality I’m pretty funny witty!
When I’m really happy and excited about something I tend to go into overload excitement mode a bit like Will Ferrell’s character in Elf. Obviously I’m not jumping up and down in my wheelchair and pulling wheelies but totally would if I could even at the embarrassment of my husband!
Bottom line? I’m owning it. I’m proud of the woman I am, wheels and all. I still have no idea what I’m doing half the time. However, age really does equal wisdom who knew!
I forgive myself and move on when I don’t get something right the first time, I recognize my good intentions and my unending love for my husband, family and friends. I know that I’m imperfect but doing the best I can. I’m no longer worried about the people who judge me that’s their opinions of me, not mine of myself.
Even if I do know how I feel right now I know one thing I definitely don’t feel like I’m nearly about to turn 40. No matter how I feel when the big 40 birthday finally arrived I will live my best life as for me everyday is a gift.
“You only live once – but if you work it right, once is enough”
Tell me your favorite thing about being in your late 30s and 40s! Did you feel the shift in personality as you neared the Big 4-0?